I must bravely confess that I have developed somewhat of a Facebook obsession. For someone who resisted the social media platform for quite some time, I have certainly become enmeshed it its disturbingly addictive snare.
There are some deeper reasons for this, I believe. I’m quite certain that it stems from the lack of security in our current situation that has driven me to seek out external validation in the form of “she’s adorable” comments on my daughter’s picture or a long list of “likes” above a video of my son, or on a new blog post. Yet, while I am aware of the unhealthy nature of this craving, I’m not quite ready to sober up and journey through the twelve steps. Forgive me for my weakness.
But, something occurred during these past two weeks that forced me into rehab for an excruciating, chill- inducing, and vomitous bout in the detox room. I began to notice that none of my updates were getting any attention at all. Not pictures, videos or most importantly, Motherfog blog entries.
I stated months ago, quite dramatically that I would not continue to link my entries to my page. Some of you subscribed, most others called my bluff. I quickly realized that 90 percent of my readers came from Facebook itself and unless I wanted to write into a void, I needed to continue to use Facebook for what it does best and self promote.
Well, normally when I link an entry, my WordPress stats page shows a considerable amount of hits in the first twenty minutes. Not that I’m checking obsessively or anything. I mean, come on. This blog is for me and me alone. It doesn’t matter how many people read and comment or don’t comment.
So naturally, It did not phase me in the slightest when I posted my last few entries and saw only a mere handful of clicks. Whatever. Who cares? I didn’t spiral into a delusional state of believing there was a massive “event” called “Ban Emily Rozek’s Page” created by an angry mob, tired of my narcissistic Facebook usage of only posting and receiving comments while rarely leaving thoughts on the pages of others. Of course not! Only someone in need of drastic psychological assistance would come to such paranoid conclusions. Sheesh!
I did however investigate. After my breathing slowed to normal and the shaking stopped, I discovered that there has been a Facebook glitch on some accounts that has kept any updates from being fed to the home news feed. My page was among that unfortunate group. Therefore, all posts were invisible. Well, invisible to those who don’t have post-its on their laptops or smart phones reminding them to visit Emily Rozek’s page. Which surprisingly, is a large percentage of people.
I read through pages of threads, people’s anger and frustration steaming off the screen. I could practically hear the slamming of fists into walls as they lamented into thin air. Complaining to Facebook personnel is as futile as posting Facebook updates to a page that is invisible to the news feed.
No one is listening.
I actually chuckled at the most brilliant social experiment I have yet to witness. I can hardly wait to find out the object of the experiment and its conclusion. Maybe it’s all linked to December 21st, 2012. That’s it! The Mayans created Facebook!
I digress. Unlike many others on those threads, my problem was fixed with a reluctant adoption of Facebook’s new Timeline format, which I had been slyly boycotting.
“Ha! I’ll show them!”, I thought. “They think they can make me switch to a stupid new layout…ha!” I say again!
Well, they can, and they did. New Timeline it is. I need my fix. And they know it. Don’t mess with the Mayans.
All those who “like” or comment are enablers….and I love you.